paranoia will destory ya [sic]

paranoia is terrifying, petrifying, but also seductive. it's an attempt to make sense of a world in which almost everything is illusory

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watched the 2nd episode of #TheThirdMan last night. i was high, and the story mirrors my paranoia, so i was a little... triggered

like how after seeing the movie, #JacobsLaddder, i ended up hyperventilating on the sidewalk

the thing about my #paranoia, is that it was so specific, and consistent, over so many years, that it feels unique, utterly my own

at the same time, the way paranoia manifests, it almost exactly matches standard horror movie story lines and tropes

paranoia is terrifying, petrifying, but also seductive. it's an attempt to make sense of a world in which almost everything is illusory

it also knows that the end-game, the purpose, of life is... death

we are born in order to die. life is the illusion. death is the only reality. everything else is a lie

#love is the only drug that can save us

(but still we must die)

(reincarnation is the theory most of us are very bad at dying, so we have to keep doing it over and over until we get it right)